Re-Read Review: If I Die by Rachel Vincent

, by Kt Clapsadl

If I Die by Rachel Vincent 
Soul Screamers #5
(Re-Read Review)


The entire school's talking about the gorgeous new math teacher, Mr. Beck. Everyone except Kaylee Cavanaugh. After all, Kaylee's no ordinary high-school junior. She's a banshee—she screams when someone dies.

But the next scream might be for Kaylee.

Yeah—it's a shock to her, too. So to distract herself, Kaylee's going to save every girl in school. Because that hot new teacher is really an incubus who feeds on the desire of unsuspecting students. The only girls immune to his lure are Kaylee and Sabine, her boyfriend's needy ex-girlfriend. Now the unlikely allies have to get rid of Mr. Beck…before he discovers they aren't quite human, either.

But Kaylee's borrowed lifeline is nearing its end. And those who care about her will do anything to save her life.


Anything.

Just like my other re-read reviews for this series, I feel the need to start off with a warning that this post is NOT a traditional review, and will be quite spoilery. Also there will be a whole lot of ranting and bashing. I'm participating in the Soul Screamers Reading Challenge hosted by Fiktshun. You can either read the books for the first time, or re-read them, and I am doing the latter. I thought it would be fun to do a post of my thoughts about things the second time around with all of the knowledge of the following books. So again, I really would not recommend reading this review if you are not caught up in reading books one through five. You have been warned. ;)

So, if you have been following along with my postings for this re-read challenge, you know that I am a HUGE Tod fan. In fact, because of that I think If I Die blows the previous books out of the water because we finally get some oh so yummy Tod time. But, he is so much more than a pretty face. His depth of love and devotion to Kaylee is incredibly amazing. He also is so much more thoughtful and pensive than his brother. He takes the time to really say what he means, and is probably one of the most caring characters imaginable. He has sacrificed so much and as much as he loved Kaylee, he wasn't willing to steal her from Nash. If she hadn't of made the first move, I don't know if he would have ever said anything about how much he cared in respect for Nash. Two years after he gave everything up for Nash, and he is still sacrificing everything for him. Funny thing is that Nash really doesn't deserve that kind of devotion, but that just goes to show you just how amazing Tod is.

As angry as I am with Nash for his behavior throughout the past several books, especially the huge Influence catastrophe, I'm ready to put it all behind me as the two of them were really never right for one another in the first place. Honestly, Nash would have never once looked Kaylee's way if they hadn't of been the same species. Also, he was too physical from the start, and never really opened up everything to her. What they had seems more physical puppy love than the real deal, and I was so happy Kaylee finally realized that. They just didn't have a solid enough foundation to withstand everything they have been through. Basically they were just stubbornly holding onto something that should have only been fleeting in the first place.

Even the second time around, I'm still amazed at Rachel Vincent's incredible ability to really shake things up without ever stepping outside of the bounds of believability. From the start, I knew Kaylee would somehow survive since the series couldn't continue without her. It was just a question whether the easy road would have been taken and her given another "free pass" or whether there would be consequences. There are many different ways she could have gone, but I really think she chose the best path. Anything else would have been too easy, and lessened the credibility of the world.  I cannot wait to get my hands on the next installment to see how Kaylee deals with all of the changes she she has gone through, both physically and emotionally. The fallout should be pretty rough, but I have faith in her ability to handle anything thrown at her, especially with Tod at her side.

Some swoon worthy quotes showing just how amazing (and funny at times) Tod really is:
"You're the brightest thing I've ever seen, Kaylee. You're this beautiful ball of fire spitting sparks out at the world, burning fiercely, holding back the dark by sheer will. And I always knew that if I reached out--if I tried to touch you--I'd get burned. Because you're not mine. I'm not supposed to feel the fire. I'm not supposed to want it. But I do. I want you, Kaylee, like I've never wanted anything. Ever. I want the fire. I want the heat, and the light, and I want the burn."
"As far as I'm concerned..." He leaned forward, his mouth inches from mine, and my pulse spiked. "There's nothing but us." His lips met mine, and he kissed me slowly, deeply, like we had all the time in the world. And in that moment, that's exactly what it felt like. 
"There's a good kind of crazy, Kaylee... It's the kind that makes you think about things that make your head hurt, because not thinking about them is the coward's way out. The kind that makes you touch people who bruise your soul, just because they need to be touched. This is the kind of crazy that lets you stare out into the darkness and rage at eternity, while it stares back at you, ready to swallow you whole."  "I've seen you fight, Kaylee. I've seen you step into that darkness for someone else, then claw your way out, bruised, but still standing. You're that kind of crazy, and I live in that darkness. Together, we'd take crazy to a whole new level."
"I'm dead, not impotent. Nasty rumors like that must be quashed before they gain momentum. Feel free to emphasize how very functional I am." 
"I don't think this is fixing you little problem," I whispered as his hand wandered slowly over my waist and toward my ribs, over my shirt now. Tod straightened and gave me a frown. "You should be careful, tossing descriptors like that around in a situation like this. My 'problem' isn't little. Unless you're drawing some pretty wild comparisons. Please tell me you're not drawing wild comparisons. Or blood-relative comparisons."
"Kaylee, you burn so bright that everyone else looks dim in comparison. You're all I see, and all I want to see, and I would be happy if this moment never ended."


*Sighs* I really love that reaper!
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